People united in one cause is a powerful thing. In my recovery, a thing that is not achieved but done every day by living sober, I have found the power of people united in one cause. In these rooms I find the advice I need, the hope I am looking for and the acceptance I forever was searching. It is powerful.
Honesty is something I have been focusing on. Not in the matter of going back into your life and correcting all the lies you may have told or lived. In the manner of living honestly. To thine own self be true. I have read and reread this statement for many years and it never meant much, today it means everything. It is the essence of who I have become. It is the glue that keeps me together. The society we live in and just life in general is one of conformity. I never felt that I had conformed as an individual, I look different than most and have always taken pride in my self expression but I now realize that I had conformed to many a thing.
Today I choose to deal with life on life's terms. To not escape, to deal with my emotions and resentments and to not bottle them up. It really is a hard task when you have lived a life of escape for many years. It is not easy, the only thing harder I know of is living a life full of drugs and alcohol. A life where everything is chaos. Chaos created by me. I am not the only one who choose to live this way, there are millions that came before me and it will continue on as long as man is on this earth.
Humans are a complex being. Feelings, emotions, resentments, we all have them and for the majority of us we don't know how to handle them and find various ways of "escaping" from our reality. I am lucky that my way of dealing with them has a recovery process that is so well supported. Yes I could have died, however I did not and I am one of the fortunate ones who gets to enjoy life and still continue on this journey. Our spiritual connection is something very important, and I am not talking about Religion. I am talking about the power of something greater than ourselves. People who have this connection, no matter the background or affiliation, seem to have peace. A peace that I long for. It all starts with Honesty. Admitting to ourselves our wrongs, our weaknesses , taking inventory of both what is good and bad. Life is about growth , growth can only be done internally when we are Honest to the guy/gal in the mirror. HONESTY and Change.
Change is difficult it requires work, something that many of us feel that we do 9-5. We work to make money and see the direct effects of hard work in the material things it produces in our lives. Hard work in self also produces results, results not seeing if you don't look, but I am finding they are much more rewarding than the material things I have.
We all have the power to change, even if we don't realize it, it is the essence of our Human existence, if you don't like something change it. We all have the ability to do so, it is only controlled by the limits we choose to accept or put on our lives. But there we have made the decision, to not change... I'll end this post with a quote from a man whom I have always held much respect for, since my early years of listening to black flag. Mr Henry Rollins:
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